FILM REVIEW: DEAD SNOW. Review by Mark Woods.

Recipe for Good Zombie Pie:

Take several fresh young actors (enough to fill 91 minutes)
Cool to near freezing on a weekend trip to a log cabin somewhere in Norway (well, Øksfjord, actually.)
Heat the tempers of a platoon of undead Nazi Zombies by invading their personal space.
Add a large dollop of humour.
Wrap up filming with decent photographic direction.
Consume with several beers.

Right, enough of the pie analogy...it's not really going anywhere and I feel slightly queasy....

Dead Snow is a Norwegian film which follows the usual teenagers-versus-unspecified-hostiles-in-a-secluded-location-format. This time its a platoon of Nazi Zombies.

During the Second World War the evil Nazi Colonel Herzog and his platoon terrorised the local village of Øksfjord. They performed unspeakable acts of horror upon the population and made their lives a living nightmare as they raped and looted to their hearts' content. Finally unable to cope anymore the locals banded together and managed to get the upper hand, chasing the troops into the mountains and it was presumed that they had all frozen to death.

The story takes place in the present day. A group of medical students, who, as usual, are far older than the teenage characters they are supposed to represent, are holidaying. They drive to their log cabin in the mountains and are equipped for a weekend of fun with all the snow-mobiles, music and drink they could wish for. It's not long before fantastic shots of fjords and snow sports fill the screen.

At first everything is tickety-boo. No problems. A good time is had by all. Then, during the evening, a stranger knocks at their door. As the old, gnarled hunter helps himself to their beer, eyes the sensational Evy Kasseth Røsten lasciviously and rolls and smokes his meagre cigarettes he recounts the tale of the Nazi oppressors being overcome in this vicinity. He warns them...strange spirits walk abroad in these forests. They need to respect their surroundings. Having scared them silly he vanishes again into the night.

The group discover a box of stolen Nazi gold in the snow. Deciding to keep it is their biggest mistake. That night their partying is interrupted by strange visitations which begin with fleeting glimpses of shadowy figures surrounding their cabin and works to a climax of gore-filled battling in the increasingly crimson snow. Chainsaws and snow-mobiles are used to good effect in dispatching their supernatural foe. The odds are stacked against them however and Colonel Herzog manages to kill them all except one despite the fact that he has been dead since the Second World War.

Our final character makes it to the car....he's lost the gold and his friends to the Nazi Zombies but managed to hang onto his life.

Except.............well. Watch the film.

I enjoyed this film. It's a load of old nonsense. Which is good as that's what I wanted. What makes it stand out is the humour. A lot of horror films, especially the low-budget variety such as this, try to give better value by attempting humour. It rarely works. This film has some genuinely laugh-out-loud moments. If you're a fan of gory deaths done with aplomb then you'll enjoy this. Oh, and Evy is lovely. Stunning. Ahem...

With stunning helicopter aerial shots of Norway the photography is head and shoulders above your usual gore flick.

Recommended zombie fun.

7/10

Review by Mark Woods, August 2009. LordBeanpod@GMail.com

zombies,undead,Norway,teenage,gore,horror,snow mobile,chainsaw,killing,gold,snow,death,evil,WWII,Nazi

Film Review: In the Mouth of Madness.

Director: John Carpenter

Earlier in the week I watched "Quatermass and the Pit" (see my previous review) and the name "Hobbs' End" stuck in my head. I was sure I'd heard it before. A quick google later and I realised I'd heard it mentioned in "In the Mouth of Madness" by John Carpenter. It's been ages since I'd seen it - about 15 years - so time for a revisit.

"Hob", with or without the second "b" is an old folk name for the Devil. He who casts no shadow. The one who walks backwards. Old Nick. You get the picture..this guy's got many names. He also appears in quite a few films which may explain why Hobb's End does too. This is the fictional location for this film.

Sutter Cane is a fictional worldwide miracle in the world of horror publishing. His books are read by EVERYONE. It's becoming a problem..fights are breaking out at bookstores if demand cannot be met. Those who read his work are oddly affected...they seem to be losing grip with reality.

Sam Neill plays an insurance investigator who is hired by Charleton Heston no less to find out what really happened to Cane who has gone missing. The publishing house has loose ends that need tying one way or another.

Beginning with Mr Neill's incarceration in a lunatic asylum (not actually named Arkham but anyone who knows Lovecraft who is the inspiration for Sutter Cane will make the natural assumption themselves) we see his story told in flashback. Sam Neil's comedic performance is excellent as the deranged inmate but somehow looses it's impact. I felt it was all to do with the "nameless horrors" and "unspeakable evil" of Lovecraft's Cthulu mythos which is the main theme of the plot. It doesn't really give an actor much to go on....horrified gaping mouths and wild eyes only go so far! When the effects do involve "creatures" they vary from pretty decent to plain silly. Not up to standard of Carpenter's "The Thing" but perhaps the budget didn't allow.

A linear script provides some genuinely creepy moments..the guy on the push-bike. Doesn't sound creepy now but watch the film. You'll know it when you see it!

As for the scene with Mrs Picket....well...that came back to me instantly as I watched it. You know how a really good bit will stick in your mind but you can't remember which film it was in? This did that for me. Perhaps I watch too many films or can't google well enough. It's a great clip anyways.

Without spoiling too much Sam Neill thinks he's sussed the whole shebang. But there's a twist. A real big twist. You'll just have to get a copy!

In conclusion..not the best horror ever but if you like your 90s thrills with a spattering of dodgy animatronics and John Carpenter's distinctive soundtrack (composed and played by the man himself, you know!) you'll enjoy 90 minutes of this.

6/10

Review: Mark Woods, LordBeanpod@GMail.com, November 2008.

lovecraft,horror,shambling horror,nightmare,asylum,sam neil,investigation,country,village,old woman,tentacles,monster,cellar,evil,blood,murder,in the mouth of madness trailer,video clip,trailer