Creative EP-630 headphones - review by Mark Woods.

After many years of using my Sony headphones I've finally had to admit it. My ears are weird. The things keep falling out. The headphones that is - not my ears.

Having recently taken up occasional running again - and I do mean occasional - I found that the movement caused by jogging caused the earpieces to constantly fall out. I'd heard about in-ear headphones with changeable sizes of earbuds and decided to give them a go.

I ordered my pair of Creative EP-630s from eBay for the princely sum of four pounds including delivery. First impressions were that they looked well built as I would expect from Creative. I immediately tried them with my Sony mp3 player and was surprised to hear what appeared to be an underwater concert. After experimenting with the earbud sizes (four are supplied) and the method of inserting them into the ear I got much better results,

The sound is a lot more bassy than I'm used to. I adjusted the graphic equaliser on my mp3 player and got very good results in the low, middle and high frequency ranges. Sounding good.

The problem of them falling out was only partially cured. The earpieces do stay in better than my previous set but they still fall out during running sessions. I now run without them. Listening while walking was improved though. They stay in place all the way into town and back. No more constant readjusting.

My major complaint is that the wires are coated in a thick rubberised material. I'm sure this makes them more durable but it is so thick that you have the feeling that you are being constantly accosted by the frenetic flailing tentacles of some deranged audio-squid. They wave around your face and are very distracting no matter how you try and arrange them The best I've managed so far is to slip them between two layers if you're wearing them. They stay in place a little more then.

The connection at the player is always the weak point on cheap headphones I've found and these have gone already. The copper wire is exposed as the rubber has broken after only a couple of uses. The unit still works but I doubt it will for long.

For the money I paid I'm happy but I wouldn't buy another pair because of the thick wires and poor connections.

7/10.

Review: Mark Woods, 2009 (LordBeanpod@GMail.com)

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Monkey Trousers - DVD Review by Mark Woods.

Monkey Trousers is a sketch show originally aired on ITV in the UK and penned by Vic Reeves (Jim Muir), Bob Mortimer,Steve Coogan,Simon Blackwell,
Jill Parker and Christian Azzola. It also features Ronni Ancona, John Thomson, Mackenzie Crook, Ralf Little, Alsitair McGowan, Rhys Thomas and Tony Way. They're all here!

Its format is similar to The Fast Show or Little Britain being character driven. We return to scenes such as the Geordie Moonshot Crew - "I smerk way mur than him, like, so I should get the ashtray", the Steve Erwin pastiche that is "The Croc Botherer"- "Let's dive on the ****!", the Idiot Estate Agent - "Has the house been on the market for long?", "I don't know - but you'll notice the shower is arranged so that the water falls onto you rather than you manually having to draw it up onto your body". Steve Coogan's disturbing creation, the Toy Shop Owner, is a highlight; "Oh, doesn't she like the Little Princess Amputee?". John Thompson had me in stitches with his voiceover artist whose performance is dictated by the type of cigarettes he smokes in the booth. The Menthol had a distrubing effect.

I own the double DVD set of this series so I've seen it a few times now...I know what I'm talking about when I say I think you either "get" Vic and Bob or you hate them. Personally I love em. Always have..always will.

If you do "get" this brand of humour you'll love this series. The comedy acting is second to none...with Vic, Bob, Steve Coogan, John Thomson et al putting in top notch timed performances.

The character based format is perfect for all the actors....Vic and Bob's being the best in my opinion. "Croc Botherer" and the Vicar both had me laughing out loud again last night when I reran the DVD....I was on my own..should I worry? I'm adamant this is carefully crafted comedy material and not tosh as some have suggested.

9/10

Review: Mark Woods, 2009 (LordBeanpod@GMail.com)

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LION CREST ENGLISH ALE - REVIEW BY MARK WOODS.

Cheap beer is rubbish, right? Wrong. I recently bought a four pack of this stuff from Tesco in March 2009 at a retail price of GBP 1.99. I have to say I was pleasantly surprised. It is brewed by Yates and Jackson brewery and is 4 percent strength.

The beer is a traditional English ale and is very hoppy. The way I like it. The hops used in beer give it the bitterness and I like my beer very hopped. For such a reasonably priced product I was surprised by how much flavour there was available to me. Incidentally the hops also preserve the beer.

Pouring revealed a nice head which stayed down the glass. Colour is good and rich - a light nut brown. Aroma is great, the hops strong and floral.

If you're bothered about packaging the can has a nice design of armoured knight with shield and lance. It will put hairs on your chest and make a man of you.

At 50 pence a can you will not find better value. A quality drink and a new favourite. Cheers!

8/10.

Review: Mark Woods, 2009 (LordBeanpod@GMail.com)

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Sleeper (1973) - Film Review.

Woody Allen plays the part of Miles Monroe, a down-trodden chemist from 1973, who has been involved in an accident which necessitated him being frozen for 200 years. He is now woken and has to come to terms with his new surroundings, the huge technological advances of the last 200 years and the changes in people. These are all too much for him and he struggles to cope. Additionally he becomes involved in a rebel plot to oust the ruling government. He is in deep - way above his head!

During his adventure he wins over Luna, a female hostage he is forced to take, played very well by Diane Keaton. Initially very scared by her captor's strange ways she comes to enjoy his company. Perhaps they will find an alternative to the universally accepted "Orgasmotron" which replaces physical contact in this new Utopia?

After being invited into the underground movement Miles embarks on a dangerous mission which, if successful, will stop the president of the new world being cloned.

Sleeper is the film which I would consider to be Woody Allen's finest work. It is genuinely funny, well filmed and the comic acting is top class. Diane Keaton is especially funny also. A science fiction story helped me enjoy the film although it is not technical enough to put you off if sci-fi isn't your thing. It's just a peg to hang the plot on.

Factoid: Woody Allen confirmed the feasibility of his scientific ideas with the science fiction writer Isaac Asimov.

The script makes fun of many sections of society. The Jewish tailor-robots were particularly amusing, one being voiced by Jackie Mason.

The leisuretime-rich population enjoy endless dinner parties. Even their sex lives are catered for with the provision of Orgasmotrons and Pleasure Spheres which are handed around as one would a "jazz-cigarette".

Random Fact: The futuristic home featured in the film was offered for sale in 2004 for 10 million dollars.
Truth-nugget: Final editing of the film was only completed 2 days before the film's release.

The excitement offered by Miles' escape is enjoyed by Luna and this gives the excuse for what is really the best part of the film - the interaction between Miles and Luna. This leads to some excellent scenes, a personal favourite being one involving Woody Allen's portrayal of Blanche Du Bois from "A Street Car Named Desire" whom he temporarily believes himself to be.

The overall filming style is somewhere between Logan's Run and Mr Bean. Always ludicrous but never churlish.

Factual Interjection: The clarinet parts in the soundtrack are played by Woody Allen himself.

While some Woody Allen films are overrated in my opinion, for example, "Take the Money and Run", this is 90 minutes of genuine, well-written comedy.

Highly recommended.

8/10

Review written by Mark Woods, April 2009. LordBeanpod@GMail.com

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Book Review - Of Mice and Men.

Having never read this book and finding that my partner's youngest is studying this currently I decided to finally read it. It's only around a hundred pages and this was a task long overdue. I'm glad that I did.

George and Lennie are travelling manual workers in California. The plot is set during the Great Depression. Work is hard to find. Things are tough. Very tough.

George is smart and slight. Lennie is large and less bright. He relies on George to guide him through life and to keep him out of trouble. George has taken pity on him.

The book takes us through their attempts at getting work on yet another ranch after yet another "incident" which was caused by Lennie's childlike behaviour. They have been forced to run from their last job and George hopes that they can make enough cash this time to buy a small holding and settle down.

They find work and are hopeful of making it this time. Sadly, things get out of hand yet again and without spoiling the tragic ending the deal is off.

You will be moved and shocked both at once by John Steinbeck's writing. His descriptions of the landscape of California and character development are incredible. I was amazed at how much emotion and imagery was packed into a mere 100 pages. You feel that you know the characters and care for them in this short time. You can almost taste the coolness of the falling evening by the river as Steinbeck paints a mental watercolour.

Just because a book is heaped in praise it doesn't always follow that is a good read. I'd always wondered why this was such a talked-about tome. For me the importance is in the writing of Steinbeck and his mastery of language. I'm sure others will argue that the historical importance is utmost. The underlying message that we are ultimately all in the same boat and need to understand each other in order to get along is admittedly important in this work. However, I still gained most from the ability of man to describe a world imagined so vividly.

I was left feeling that I had done myself a favour by reading this short story.

If you love the English language as I do then this book is well deserving of the praise in my opinion.

9/10

Review by Mark Woods, LordBeanpod@GMail.com, 2008.

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